Collection

Spirituality, non-duality and gurus

Something happens on a retreat, or on a drug, or at half past three in a room with nobody in it, and afterwards there is an industry waiting to explain what it was and what it costs. These pieces sit in that gap. They take meditation, Buddhism and non-duality seriously enough to be rude about the packaging: the guru with the immaculate posture, the awakening described in the language of a product launch, the sincere seeker who has mistaken exhaustion for peace. Scepticism here is not a pose against the thing itself — several of these pieces plainly want it to be true. They just refuse to pretend that wanting is evidence.

I'm Calling BS on the Guru
Dialogues

I'm Calling BS on the Guru

Curve balls

Noah Blue · 9 min read

I'm rich, yes. I fucking worked hard for it. I deserve every penny. It's not easy sitting up here saying the same things endlessly and being bored to tears with meditating or pretending to meditate.

A meditating monk in saffron robes reflected inside a large animal eye, city lights behind him
Wittering asides

Regarding so-called spirituality

Questions, not answers

Noah Blue · 3 min read

Is it possible that the mystics are all lunatics? Is it possible that their acolytes are fools? Is it possible, in other words, to go a whole lifetime believing in something that isn't real?

7 Highly Effective Techniques For Inducing a Full-Fledged Spiritual Awakening
Wittering asides

7 Highly Effective Techniques For Inducing a Full-Fledged Spiritual Awakening

Disclaimer: use at your own risk (these techniques work, that’s the point)

Noah Blue · 6 min read

Quit your job. Sell all of your possessions (apart from the clothes you are wearing) and any property you may own. Withdraw your savings. Give all of the money you have harvested to the least deserving person you can think of.

Spirituality (or equivalent sign)
Wittering asides

Spirituality (or equivalent sign)

Notes from the field

Noah Blue · 7 min read

Here are some things I've learned about spirituality. I hope they can be of use to you.

Peptide aphorisms
Aphorisms

Peptide aphorisms

Self-injected

Noah Blue · 2 min read

I do not stand by anything I say, lest it topples over and crushes me under the colossal weight of its banality.

Sweat-lodge aphorisms
Aphorisms

Sweat-lodge aphorisms

#delirium

Noah Blue · 2 min read

Without the accounting profession, capitalism would be impossible. And without capitalism where would we be?

Raver aphorisms
Aphorisms

Raver aphorisms

Ones and twos

Noah Blue · 2 min read

I have been hijacked by a compulsive desire to connect with my fellow human. I have no idea who I am any more.

Roller-blade aphorisms
Aphorisms

Roller-blade aphorisms

Groovy

Noah Blue · 2 min read

A while ago now I came across, and made a point of memorising, the word ‘evert’. Two reasons. One, I have vocab OCD. Two, it struck me then, and continues to strike me now, that this is a pretty useful verb for someone like me to have at their disposal.

Drivel
Wittering asides

Drivel

From the diary

Noah Blue · 70 min read

I am 44 years old and have almost no friends to speak of. I am unemployed, voluntarily so (if, that is, you believe in free will, which isn’t something to necessarily take for granted these days). The truth is I’ve had enough of paid employment, for now anyway. Luckily for me, my wife takes care of my material needs (and the dog’s).

Close-up of wide blue eyes against a bleached monochrome face, staring directly at the viewer
Fiction

Other than my parents splitting up, nothing much has happened recently

A coming-of-age tale (mostly)

Noah Blue · 27 min read

My dad recently moved out of the family home and into a studio apartment in a rundown part of town known for illicit activities. Why that part of town, I have no idea. It’s not as if my dad is poor and has to live there. In fact, he could probably afford to live in the so-called salubrious part of town if he wanted to.

A plain white theatrical mask floating against a solid black background
Aphorisms

Intellectual morse code

Dots and dashes

Noah Blue · 4 min read

The banality of life becomes tragic when children are born. We are suddenly forced to admit that what didn't matter now does even though it still doesn't.